Forbes Family Home Page

Updated:19/06/2005

Visit Val's kitchen	Buena Vista Cafe, home of the Irish Coffee.	Books & library links
We're into Japanese gardens. IF you have broadband/cable, follow this link to a virtual tour of a garden, complete with music.	Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat.                                 Alex Levine	Visit my Blog

Val's scrolling joke box: (Ladies, this is for you!)

Start scrolling now: Question: How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? Answer: Dunno, it's never been done before.  

Ladies versus Real Women

Start scrolling now: ************************************************* ******* Ladies - Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away. Real Woman - Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink. You might still have the headache, but who cares? ************************************************* ******* Ladies - Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips. Real Woman - Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Christ's sake. You are probably lying on the couch, with your feet up, eating it anyway. ************************************************* ******* Ladies - To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes. Real Woman - Buy boxed mashed potato mix and keep it in the pantry for up to a year. ************************************************* ******* Ladies - When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the inside of the cake. Real Woman - Go to the bakery - they'll even decorate it for you. ************************************************* ******* Ladies - Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish. Real Woman - Sara Lee frozen pie directions do not include brushing egg whites over the crust, so I just don't do it. ************************************************* ******* Ladies - If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non slip grip that makes opening jars easy. Real Woman - Go ask the cute neighbor guy to do it. ************************************************* ******* And finally THE MOST IMPORTANT TIP.... Ladies - Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces. Real Woman -LEFT OVER WINE?????